Everybody gets invites to lunch from friends. Cafes and restaurants of all sort are packed with full tables of 4-8 hipster buddies, writing hakius (only if it’s April), discussing Carl Jung, and mocking western medicine. So how does the hipest of the hipster culture react? Eating alone of course! For one thing, when friends ask you out to lunch you can say that you can’t because you really need some time to think. This will make them think that you’re really deep and focused, and even willing to sacrifice fun times with others so you can meditate on whatever world crisis is obscure right now. How about tribes clashing in Darfur over gum arabic production? When you get to the restaurant and the hostess asks you how many you can proudly proclaim “just me.” Because that’s who’s on top of the hottest trend right now, just you baby, just you.